Put your seatbelts on y’all, this one’s gonna be rough.

   Well, this is one I was hoping not to have to write. The last appointment I had with the VA wasn’t good news. I had three appointments that day, ENT, radiation and chemo. Chemo was set to be 1^st at 10:30, but due to overbooking after 2 ½ hours we had to go to the ENT appointment. Everything there was all clear, but they gave me the results of the latest CAT scan. However, they were vague about how to interpret it, so I went on to radiation for the next appointment. He too was vague about the exact meaning, but did confirm that the fact that the nodules in my lungs were cancer that had metastasized ( moved ) from the original site in my tonsils. He also said that they had tripled in size since the last scan three months ago and that current radiation treatment programs available through the VA were too destructive to lung tissue to be practical. Their beam can’t be focused tightly enough to be therapeutic without damaging a lot of surrounding area and thereby essentially destroying too much lung.  After we left there we went back to chemo where we waited another hour or so and finally got in. There we finally got the answer we didn’t want. Without treatment I would have a little over a year to live. The chemo Dr. said that with another round of chemo that I could have as much as five years. She asked if I wanted to do that and of course I said yes, so she put me on a schedule to be seen again for evaluation as to what type of chemo I would get this time. She did say that there were several spots ( no one has ever said exactly how many ) but only two had grown so much. The whole day a downer to be sure.

   We went home to start breaking the news to family and some close friends. Our friends that had bought me the teeth, Terri and Michael, called to ask what we were doing that weekend and we told them to come on up. I figured that they should probably know first since I still wasn’t really sure how I was going to break this to my family and I knew that they would be able to help me with the dialogue. As it turned out, Terri, who is a genius at research, found a program at MD Anderson in Houston that pioneered a program that a nationally known cancer center is now using. Their program involves a very tightly focused beam of radiation and possible chemo. The tighter focus on the beam allows it to kill the cancer with very little damage to surrounding areas.

   We’ve now gotten started on that and are just waiting on paperwork to go through for the doctors to review to see if I will qualify for their program. The biggest downside to this is that I will have to be in the Houston area for about two months while undergoing treatment.            However our friends have bought a 5^th wheel camper trailer that can be parked fairly close to MD. Without these two friends we would have been very nearly lost. 

   On top of all of this Teresa has had her surgery for her hiatal hernia, which went well, so we have had a lot on our plates lately. The timing of all of this together has been hard, but Terri has been able to stand off with a calm eye on the situation and an ability to figure out a way through all of this. Terri has started a gofundme account to help us manage our dwindling finances. The link to this is  www.gofundme.com/thankyoufriends . There is a short story to explain to those who aren’t familiar with what is going on. Any size donation is greatly appreciated. This part in particular is especially hard for me as I have never really needed much help before, but after being off of work for over a year and with only social security to rely on for income, things have gotten awfully tight. And as always your prayers are greatly appreciated.

   On a good note, I’m eating much better now, although I still am not gaining any weight. However, it did take me 30 years to get up to my pre-treatment weight so I’m not really surprised at that. Also Teresa’s brother and his wife are letting us stay with them due to her surgery and doctor being only five miles away from here. It’s also fairly close to where our friends are living that are helping out with the thing with MD Anderson.

   So far that’s the worst of it. There are a few more tests that the VA has in store and if MD falls through, the VA has another round of chemo up their sleeve. I really don’t want anyone to get all weepy about this, mainly because I’m not. It’s not that I think that I’m superman or that I’m in denial ( that’s in Egypt isn’t it ). It’s just that I refuse to let this get me down. This past summer when my strength was at it’s lowest, although I didn’t feel as good as the Energizer bunny, I still kept pushing on. Don’t worry, I’ll let everyone know when it’s time to invest in Kleenex stock.

   Now I’m going to put this out there. To all of my driver friends out there be safe. I don’t really miss the traffic, but I do miss all of you. To my friends at TTI, it’s the best job I’ve ever had and I miss y’all too. And since I don’t know any fat ladies, it ain’t over by a long shot.